Grief, the pain of loss, can sneak up on us when we are least expecting it. Several of my friends lost children in the first two weeks of February. Going through the journey of baby losses over and over again knocked the breath out of me.
Several of my friends and family received bad health news in early February.
A friend has asked me to walk with her through her daughter's life endangering behavior. Watching this young lady, who has been taught better, spiral downward is so awful I lack words to describe it. Sometimes the home training is there, but it doesn't take root.
A few of my friends announced last month they are dying or watching their spouses die. One, unless God intervenes, has begun the beginning of a long, painful, and ugly death as predicted by his doctors. I miss the fun and adventurous person he was even while loving and admiring the more "careful with his energy" person he is now. I dread what is coming.
Loss is a part of life. So are the normal aggravations, of which, February wrote an unusually long list. From an electrical fire to frozen pipes that turned our one hour morning chores into a three hour endurance marathon for two weeks straight to livestock that decided to establish territorial boundaries in midst of a snow storm ...and, well, so forth, it was a hectic time. Demands on me were great. I am also waiting on medical test results for myself. (It's probably nothing, but we decided to test, in case.)
I became very worn down. Life does that to you.
When I can't take it any more,
I get alone
and read the Promises.
With a rested body and renewed mind my soul sings "Yes, Lord!" to His comfort and of His promises.
Some people recharge with song, or dance, or need lots of people around them. For me, it is in the stillness where I can hear and feel Him. I get so much out of my "walk and talks" with the Lord. When my heart is heavily anguished to the point it is affecting my physical body, I go to my room, close the door, lay down, and talk to the Lord until my energy is spent, and then sometimes, I sleep deeply.
I am thankful He is a well I can always go to. He never refuses me and never runs dry. He is reliable and trustworthy. I am also thankful that while He is supplying me with my needs, He is supplying the ones I care about too. Even better, He is there for you too, dear reader.