Article: Why Pregnancy Before Marriage Isn't a Sin

I realize a lot of people's minds are going to be tripped up over wording, but the underlying message of this article written by Ivan G is so important to convey. I agree, as does the author, that sex outside of marriage is a sin. What about the baby?

If we believe God knew and formed each human being in our mother's wombs, then we can't call any pregnancy an accident or a mistake. Children are called a heritage and reward (very good things!) with no quantifiers on when or how placed on that statement. 

If Christians do not give the hope that is in Jesus and reach out to young women who find themselves in this situation, we are worse than the abortion culture so loudly calling to them. Why do I say worse?  Because we have LIFE (Jesus) to offer while all the abortion culture is selling is death. God condemns sin, but He offers truth with love, mercy, hope, peace, and joy to the repentant. Our words and action need to reflect His plan of redemption.

"We tend to use words like “unwanted” for a pregnancy that is unplanned. But every baby is wanted by God. He/she is knitted together in a womb, and Jesus has died for that child. We should not use “unwanted” and “unplanned” interchangeably." read more at Why Pregnancy Before Marriage Isn't a Sin

"So my number one concern for those in this situation isn’t if they will have challenges, but how is her relationship with God? And that should be yours too. If restoration is needed, remember to restore gently (Galatians 6:1)." read more at Response to Why Pregnancy Before Marriage Isn't a Sin

Graphic Warning Label for Abortion Pictures

Galations 5:22-23 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. (emphasis mine)

I would like to express gratitude to the people who show compassion and thoughtfulness to mothers with baby/child losses by including a graphic image warning with a link on Facebook instead of an abrupt image of a dead baby. Thank you for not reawakening my grief and adding another heart burden as I make the effort to go forward. Like the women I counsel, some days are very hard, so I appreciate your efforts to not turn my challenges into obstacles. You understand God's command to encourage and uplift each other and to help carry burdens instead of adding to them.

My prayer is that God will send people to show you the same level of kindness and gentleness in the tender areas of your life as what you have shown mothers like me.

Today, I remember one of my nine. Rebecca, my little one, passed from my womb into the Lord's care. It's been years, but my heart still aches for her. Not another baby, but my daughter.

Article: Are the Duggars to Blame?

Are the Duggars to Blame?

"Some basic understanding of biblical theology is in order here. Whether you are parents as strict as the Duggars or not, if you are a Christian, there are some basic truths you need to understand:

1. Nothing you do will or can save your children. Only God’s mercy can.
2. Point one doesn’t, in any way, absolve us from our responsibility to raise our children in righteousness and truth. How we do this will certainly vary from one family to the next, but we are obligated to be faithful to our duty, even though the outcome rests in God’s hands.

...

The summary of the whole matter?

The Duggars are not to blame. If anything, they appear to have been more faithful and deliberate than most parents I know, to point their children to Christ, to warn them of sin, to show them of their need of a Savior, and to help them avoid the temptations Scripture warns us about.

Sin is to blame.

Satan is roaming the earth, seeking whom he may devour. That includes us and our children. We are duty-bound to be faithful, to love the Lord, to teach our children, especially by example, how to walk in truth and to hate sin because God hates sin. We must be transparent with our own sins, always reminding our children of their desperate need of a Savior. We need to beg the Father for grace over the lives of our children and pray fervently for them–for their salvation and for their sanctification. And then, we entrust it all to the Lord. And we don’t blame ourselves (or other parents) for the sins of our children.

We must do justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with our God." 

read the rest of this very thoughtful article here.

His Grace

“I am no longer anxious about anything, as I realize that He is able to carry out His will for me. It does not matter where He places me, or how. That is for Him to consider, not me, for in the easiest positions He will give me grace, and in the most difficult ones His grace is sufficient.” Hudson Taylor

Parenting Quote

"One of the questions they’re most frequently asked is why their children all obviously love the Lord and each other. Marilyn says they heard the answer from their son Nate, who told Marilyn that the Boyer children “never got the impression that we were burdens to you, that there was nothing you’d rather do than be with us.” 

Member Spotlight: The Boyer family/The Learning Parent

Marking the Moments

Brandon is safely home! He stayed in a nice hotel in a business suite with a bedroom, den, office, and kitchen. He was driven around everywhere and was taken out to eat for all meals except breakfast. During his review, he was told he "exceeded expectations!" He was given a very nice raise which is his second in a year.

Brandon was picked up by an eager Amanda who sent me a text which said "I HAVE him!!" When he arrived hom, we attacked him with hugs and kisses all at one time. We decked his bedroom out in clowns and a big "Welcome Home!" sign. We made him a cake in the shape of a clown. We put up streamers everywhere in his room. We also parked his new car out front with a "For Sale" sign just for a laugh.

Monday, when he thinks he can get a rest from our fun loving family, he'll walk into his office which was also targeted with clowns and a note. 

I think it is important to make a fuss over family. It's one of the ways we show them we love them. 

Acting like every day is "just another day" makes life tedious, especially on the young. Life has many average days and far too many sad moments. When there is a blessing from the Lord, His people should celebrate! Marking those moments increases awareness of God's goodness in our lives. People will make an effort at things that matter to them, and God blessing you should matter. Welcoming loved ones home with rejoicing also helps us get a tiny glimpse of how exciting it will be when the Lord returns and we are gathered together in His Name!

Ecclesiastes 3:4 A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

Happy to Help!

Brandon asked me to look after his cat while he was gone. On the day before he left, I asked Brandon what, how much, and how often I needed to feed his cat." I just leave the bag on the floor, and he eats what he wants when he wants it." "How often do you fill his water bowl, and where is it kept?" "I keep the aquarium full. He hops up on the dresser and drinks from that." He changed the litter before he left. So, all I am really doing is petting the cat!

The Best Part of Waking Up...

I don't know whether to laugh or puke. Joshua just told me that when he was little he thought the Folgers jingle 

"♬ The best part of waking up is Folgers in your cup! ♬" was

"♬The best part of waking up is VULTURES in your cup. ♬"

Want to Ruin Your Kids?

"Want to ruin your kids? Example is important. When your little one throws a temper tantrum, respond with one of your own. Either don't punish him, or punish him with a good show of anger. You must show him that he is being punished as a form of tension relief for you, not for the benefit of his training." -Rick Boyer

I have learned a great deal about Christian parenting and homeschooling from Rick and Marilyn Boyer, who are parents of 14 and were at the forefront of the battle for educational freedom in the 1980s. Their work enabled us to homeschool easily and without harrassment.

Baked Donut Recipe

Amanda made these for our family with different toppings. They are very tasty! I plan on making them again, but plain, and serve with almonds for a fast Sunday breakfast.

Cinnamon Baked Doughnut Recipe

Pictures of Croatia from Krzysztof in Poland

These pictures were taken by Brandon's friend, Krzysztof, who took them on his vacation somewhere in Croatia. "Chris," as we call him, gave permission for them to be shared here.

Thank you, Krzysztof, for sharing your pictures with us! Croatia is beautiful, and I can clearly see why your family chooses to vacation there. May God continue to bless you and your family.

Quote on Pride and Humility

They that know God will be humble; they that know themselves can not be proud. John Flavel

Friendship Tip

When someone has a death in the family or has an important date for something like major surgery, I make a note of it on my electronic calendar. For the death or other traumatic event, I will have it remind me yearly so I can pray for them and call or drop them a note. For the surgery or other one day event, I use it as a reminder to pray and also send them a note of encouragement. It takes seconds to set it up and a couple of minutes to send a thoughtful e-mail or text, but it means so much to the people who are on the receiving end of it.

Parenting Quote

Common Scenario:

New Parent to Veteran Parents: "Wow! You're children are so well-behaved! And they like each other! And they respect and obey you! You are so lucky!"

Veteran Parents: "Well, it isn't really 'luck.' We teach them, train them, discipline them, love them, nurture them, shelter them, give them proper sleep, diet, exercise and nutrition. We cut out sugar, caffeine, and harmful television, internet and video game use. We demonstrate godly character and a good work ethic. We saturate them in a Spirit-filled home environment and soak their minds in God's Word. We maintain a strong, united marriage. We spend every minute we can with them and give them an education from a thoroughly Biblical worldview. It's a lot of hard work, but it's worth it!"

New Parent: "Like I said, 'You sure are lucky!'" -- Family Renewal LLC

One Way to Ruin Your Children

Children need the example, instruction, oversight, correction, and love adults give. Children emulate the behaviors they see around them. We are not raising children to behave like children. We are raising them to behave like adults. I personally believe one of the worst things you can do is segregate children from adults, parents, and siblings. Just because everyone else is doing it does not mean it is the best option.

"Want to ruin your kids? Age segregation is critical. Send them to a school where they'll be assigned to a class by age, regardless of ability level. That separates them from their siblings as well as their parents. Then put them in lots of age-segregated extracurricular activities to further insulate them from the adult world. Finally, put them in all the youth activities at church so that they don't have a common worship experience with their families and other adults. The idea is to surround them with immature social and spiritual models, because we have a strong tendency to become like the people we spend the most time with. Do these simple things and you can be assured that your kids will not grow up to be responsible adults any time soon." -Rick Boyer

Conterfeits

I've heard of a counterfeit bill that got into circulation. It bought food for a hungry family, it bought medicine for some sick folks, it even went to church and got in the collection plate. but at the bank, it fell under the sharp eye of the teller and when he spotted it, it was all over... If you're a phoney, the day will declare it and you will be found out. ~Vance Havner