A group of ladies and I were discussing how we can know who to safely help or let into our lives. All of us had stories of people who abused our trust. This is where we ended up with in our study:
I would rather find out I was generous to someone who didn't really need the help than to have neglected to show Christ's love to someone who had a genuine need because I wrongly judged their motives. I am able to seek the Lord for discernment about who and when I will help, but that doesn't mean I will get it right every time. Sometimes, the Lord may lead you to show kindness to someone who is not genuine in order that they will see God's love, or be exposed to warn others, or even to heap coals upon their head. If God leads you to it, there is a purpose in it.
I would rather have found out I showed love and forgiveness by opening a door to someone who was set on deceiving me than to have shut out someone who truly sought to mend a relationship. The former might make me angry and feel manipulated, but the latter is too important to miss since God Himself "has committed us to the message of reconciliation." I'd rather deal with my own anger and hurt caused by the deceiver than to have shut out the genuine person and be the one who caused them pain.
I want to serve the Lord and in doing so, it means I sometimes will make mistakes in perceiving people's intentions. Sometimes I might give to a greedy person or trust someone who is scheming behind my back. But I am not judged for their intentions. I have to diligently seek the Lord in every area, use the wisdom found in His Word, and trust in Him to lead me. If I have sincerely done that and end up trusting someone who does not deserve it, I have to trust there is a lesson in it for me as well as them.
Being a compassionate, joyful, kind, gentle and self controlled person who endures in a world that is harsh and full of embittered people seeking to serve themselves is not easy. However, we weren't called to easy work.
