Recently, I had some people wrongly assume from posts that Clint is abusing me. He's not. I have two friends, much like family, in bad situations. One has found a measure of relief. The other is doing what she can to get free. I did have another friend come ask me what was prompting me to share things I've shared. I appreciated that. That's what we are suppose to do.
Then Amanda fell and injured her face around the same time, so people saw things and jumped to conclusions on that. I know what it looks like, but those posts have nothing to do with Amanda or her injuries. If someone hit her repeatedly, I doubt she'd be without defensive wounds. Both sides of her face would be affected too. More observation and a little logic would have led to the truth.
A few years ago, I shut down my FB for a few weeks. Evidently that disconnected Clint's and my pages. People started saying Clint and I were getting a divorce. We weren't. I needed a break from the political ugliness and heated arguments between friends.
A few years ago, a friend ended a 30 year friendship because she saw me commenting on her estranged family's post. I had no idea they weren't getting along, but she assumed I did and took it as me choosing sides. I only wanted to encourage a friend who was facing heavy criticism for honoring her dying father's wishes.
I understand because I have jumped to conclusions too. People have a tendency to interpret things according to their viewpoint based on their life experiences, current situation, and/or emotions. If my friend had thought about what I shared outside of her circumstances, she may have realized I had to be referring to something else because it didn't quite fit her situation. Strong emotions and preconceived ideas muddy intellectual reasoning.
I wish I had been free to tell my friend about the shooting, but our family's safety was our first concern. We only told around a dozen people. I wrote these posts about it a year ago. We decided to wait until now in case there was something we did not see about the situation. Someone shot into our home in the middle of the night! We felt discretion was in order. I have yet to see a roadmap for our particular situation. We did the best we could.
Instead of assuming things about what is shared here or on Facebook, do the easy thing and ask. Our email is in the header. It takes only a couple of minutes to write a few sentences. If you are unwilling to do that, ask why is it easier for you to assume the worst than to simply ask for clarification.
I believe the GO command in Matthew 18:15 is so misunderstandings can be cleared up quickly to prevent bitterness from taking root. We can work in our hearts to build roadblocks with the boulders of assumptions, or we can open the lines of communication by asking questions.
I am only responsible for what is in my heart as I share not for anyone else's as they read and interpret. God knows my heart, and that is all that matters to me.
"If others tell us something we make assumptions, and if they don't tell us something we make assumptions to fulfill our need to know and to replace the need to communicate. Even if we hear something and we don't understand we make assumptions about what it means and then believe the assumptions. We make all sorts of assumptions because we don't have the courage to ask questions.” ―
